Vanier News – January 13, 2012

IN THIS ISSUE

POLL QUESTION of the WEEK


Previous poll questions and results:

  • Should school uniforms be considered at Georges Vanier Elementary? YES: 68% NO: 32%
  • Does violence in video games promote violent behaviour in children? YES: 86% NO: 14%
  • Should security cameras be used at our school? YES: 89% NO: 11%

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A Little Support Goes a LONG Way

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A “Special” Visitor creates questioning Kindergarten Students
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We were fortunate this past week (though some who don’t like spiders would debate that) to have Roan, one of our Kindergarten students, share his pet tarantula with us. The most important aspect of this sharing was the wonder and awe created in our youngest students. Here is a sample of the thoughtful questions asked about Roan’s tarantula:

  • Question: What does it eat? Answer: Crickets. He eats four crickets once per month. He only eats live crickets that he catches in his cage. The tarantula will spin a web around the cricket and save it for feeding later.
  • Question: Is it poisonous? Answer: Yes, the tarantula’s spikey hairs are poisonous. If he senses danger he can project the poisonous hairs up to 6 feet to protect himself from attackers. When a human gets stung by one of these tarantula hairs, it will causes a very itchy blood blister.
  • Question: Why do we have to be very quiet around him? Answer: The spider is scared of loud noises and if he feels scared he might make himself look really big and then project his poisonous hairs. We want to respect the spider’s needs and also protect ourselves.
  • Question: Do they eat people? Answer: No, he’s too small for that.
  • Question: Why does he sleep? Answer: He gets tired like you and me and then he needs to sleep so he’s not tired.

Thank you to Ms, Bujan for compiling and sharing these questions.

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Kindergarten Registration
Children who turn 5 before January 1, 2014 are eligible to begin school in September, 2013. Registration begins at all Elementary schools in Surrey on Monday, January 21, 2013. Please click here to read more…

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PARENTING CORNER: PARENTING WITH LOVE AND LOGICAL CONSEQUENCES
Source

How does parenting with love and logical consequences work? It works because it emphasizes learning of what the consequences are and understanding the purpose of the consequences. It teaches independence and responsibility, not only from the child learning from theconsequences of his behavior, but due to the fact the child participates in determining the consequences. Parents must always be prepared to modify the consequences depending upon the situation and the child.

A healthy child needs the setting of consequences and consistent limits because as he grows toward adulthood he will, eventually, have to face the consequences of his actions anyway. Parenting with love and logical consequences will properly prepare your child for the future.

Parenting with love and logical consequences applies to limit setting too. Limit setting refers to your expectations, regarding how you expect your child to act or behave each day. It’s important for care givers to discuss their behavioral expectations with the child in advance so that he comes to know and agree with these expectations before he breaks any of the rules. Parenting with love and logical consequences teaches the child what
the rules are and what to expect when the rules are broken.

For example, one rule of conduct might be no swearing. It’s important to go over words considered swear words, and what the consequences will be for breaking this rule. An example, of a consequence, depending upon the age of the child, is having him spend time in his room writing about swearing. How he feels hearing other kids swear? How he thinks others react to his swearing. Where he learned to swear? What are his future swearing plans? Why he swore this time? One can make the list longer in proportion to the depth of the problem. Then one can discuss the problem with the child and make the length of that discussion, also, proportional to the problem.

Hence, in parenting with love and logical consequences, the child learns about his negative behavior. Rather than simply being punished for it, he is made to think about it, and its consequences.

Setting limits work better if reasons for the rule are explained, in such a manner, that the child, not only understands the reasons, but, also, realizes it is for his own betterment. This is what parenting with love and logical consequences is all about.

What’s more, the explanation and the consequences must be age appropriate. A five year old might be simply told that swearing sounds bad, where a ten year old might be asked what he thinks of someone who swears, or that you don’t like swearing because it is often loud and upsetting, and other people find it disturbing as well. Moreover, it might be explained that swearing indicates a lack of emotional control, and we all need to learn to control our emotions to a certain degree. Thus parenting with love and logical consequences takes into account the age of the child.

Consequences work better when they can be agreed upon by both parent and child since then the child is more likely to comply with a consequence he helped create. It might be that a five year old will take a five minute time out as her consequence, but a ten year old might agree to a 10 minute time out spent in his room thinking about what he said and why it happened. As mentioned previously, they could write about what caused them to curse and what they could do to prevent it from happening next time. Then they might explain to you what they wrote. Hence, parenting with love and and logical consequences increases the child’s commitment to betterment by encouraging him to contribute to the program.

It is important to keep in mind that parenting with love and logical consequences is not a one size fits all program. The five year old might spend two minutes sitting down in the kitchen thinking about what he did and then be able to talk to you about it when he’s done. Different consequences are appropriate for different ages and different children. Tailor consequences to suit your children.

Keep in mind punishment is not the goal, but improved behavior. It is important to see that limits are consistently enforced and not changed haphazardly. This can confuse the child and prevent the consequence from effectively decreasing the undesirable behavior. If the child thinks he can talk you out of a consequence, then he will try. It is best not to listen to excuses, but simply demand the child face the agreed upon consequences forthwith. Therefore, simply tell the child to go to his room or whatever behavioral consequence was agreed upon. The more you allow the child to delay, control or change the consequences once he has misbehaved, the less effective they will be, and the more the undesirable behavior will remain or worsen. Although parenting with love and logical consequences is tailored for each unique child, it must be consistently followed and enforced.

On the other hand, it is important not to apply consequences that are too harsh. The point is not to make the child suffer, but to help him learn from his mistakes. This page isn’t meant to discuss limit setting and consequences in a detailed manner, on account of the fact that this is such a vast subject that books have been written about this topic. Reading one or two of these books and discussing any questions you might have with a counselor should save any parent a lot of time and trouble.

Unlike the Ten Commandments, these books are guides and needn’t be followed verbatim. Rather, such materials can be used as a resource upon which you can develop your own approach to limit setting, one that you can tailor to suit you and your family.

Despite my cursory introduction to parenting with love and logical consequences, this topic is extremely important for it is through the experiencing of parenting with love and logical consequences that a child becomes prepared to live with real world consequences for her actions once she leaves the safety of her home. It is through the setting of reasonable limits and consequences that a parent teaches the child to control her own behavior. 

In other words, this is how the child learns self-control. This self-control applies to the child’s control of her own emotions. Imagine how difficult and confusing it must be for a child that never had the good fortune of learning how to cope with and control her own emotions? Imagine how much you can help your child with this task by providing them with, not only proper limits and consequences but providing the older child with the logical reasoning behind such goals that she can understand.

Limit and behavioral consequence setting by the parent is crucial in order for children to learn to reason what the consequences of their actions will be, and to develop the inner control to calm themselves down, after a stressful
situation. Children learn all these abilities and more chiefly from their parents.

The following is a summary of how to parent with love and logical consequences:

  1. Make sure your child clearly understands how you expect him to behave.
  2. Discuss the consequences of misbehavior and get his input on what those consequences might be.
  3. Remember children are more likely to comply with consequences they helped create.
  4. Have your child explain to you and role play what behaviors you expect of him.
  5. Consequences for misbehavior should not emphasize punishment but learning to do the right thing by thinking about the problem and discussing it.
  6. Have him explain the consequences so you can be sure he understands them clearly.
  7. Don’t forget to praise and point out positive behavior and the consequences of good behavior!
  8. Catch your child behaving positively and praise him. Try to see there are three praise statements to every
    negative statement.
  9. Be sure the child understands that the consequences, both negative and positive, are for his own betterment.
  10. Be sure all behavioral expectations and consequences are age appropriate and child appropriate. Remember kids are different. Tailor consequences to suit your children.

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LEARNING COMMONS NEWS
Students in Divisions 7, 8 and 9 are enjoying a lunch time reading club in the Learning Commons. We are reading ‘I Survived Hurricane Katrina’ by Lauren Tarshis. Our slogan is ‘Learning Gives you Super Powers’. Students will be learning about hurricanes, global warming, sustainability and recycling.
We will be creating student designed books, painting T Shirts and finding stamps from the countries we discuss and will have a celebration at the end of the project in March. Students will be creating a video which will be presented during an assembly and posted on the Learning Commons blog.

Reading Gives you Super Powers! - Josh Z.

Reading Gives you Super Powers! – Josh Z.

A reminder that Division 7 meets on Tuesdays, Division 8 on Wednesdays and Division 9 on Thursdays.

Click here to see what’s happening in the Georges Vanier Learning Commons…

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AUTHENTIC LEARNING: Mystery Skype
This past Wednesday was a busy day for Ms. Chohan and Ms. Lutz’s class as they each participated in Mystery Skype sessions.  During Mystery Skype, classes ‘virtually’ connect with other classes around the world using free video communication software called Skype. We can see them and they can see us. Classes take turns asking strategic questions, trying to figure out where the other class is from. Students learn about questioning skills, as well as directions and geography. Click here to learn more about Mystery Skype. This past week, Ms. Chohan’s class connected with a class in Budd Lake, New Jersey, while Ms. Lutz’s class got to know a class from Dominion City, Manitoba. Listen to what our students had to say about this authentic learning experience:
Rohin: “I liked it [Mystery Skype] because it took us a long time and we got to answer questions and we had jobs to do.”
Puneet: “At the beginning I was shy to talk, but after I spoke once or twice I wasn’t shy. Also, I really had to think twice before I wasted questions.”
Aden: “I enjoyed Mystery Skype because it challenged me to pin point a location.”
Risham: “I felt really good about Skyping because I liked my job. I would like to do it again!”
Jocelyn: “It felt really good to meet new people from somewhere else. At first, I thought they were British. It was fun!”
Maegan: “I liked it [Mystery Skype] because it was fun. I enjoyed my job as the ‘Runner’.”
Kye: “It was fun doing the Mystery Skype because I liked my job, it was a bit hard in the beginning, but it was really fun afterwards.”

Ms. Chohan's class connects virtually with students from Budd Lake, New Jersey.

Ms. Chohan’s class connects virtually with students from Budd Lake, New Jersey.

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FREE FAMILY COUNSELLING

In addition to services provided at Georges Vanier by counsellor Lisa Jouzy, students in Surrey School District and their parents or guardians have access to a range of free family counselling services through a partnership with Simon Fraser University’s Faculty of Education.

SFU provides counsellors for the centre — qualified staff and graduate students conducting practicums — while the school district contributes the clinic facilities.
Counselling promotes the mental health of individuals and families and this often also addresses barriers to student learning.

Counselling services are available for a range of personal issues, including parenting, bereavement, depression, anxiety, bullying and sexual orientation.

The SFU Surrey Counselling Centre, which opened in 2009, is located at L.A. Matheson Secondary, 9484 122nd St. Call 604-587-7320 to make an appointment.

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WHAT’S COMING UP?
January 16 – Uzume Taiko fine arts performance – 10:45 a.m.
January 21 – Kindergarten Registration Begins
January 28 – Clothes on Wheels at Vanier
February 8 – Professional Development Day – Classes not in session
February 11 – Family Day Holiday – Classes not in session
March 18-28 – Spring Break – Classes not in session
March 29 – Good Friday – Classes not in session
April 1 – Easter Monday – Classes not in session
April 2 – Term 2 Reports Home
April 4 – Early Dismissal at 1:27 p.m.
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